I woke up with a shuddering start, a blinding light shining in my face. My first instinct was to cover my eyes, but my hands resisted, strapped down to my sides. Turning my head and squinting, I saw three or four people standing above me, surgical masks and plastic eyewear over their faces.
“He's awake,” one of them said, turning.
“More sedative,” someone else said.
[["Where am I?"|First Question]]
[["What's going on?"|First Question]]
(set: $nicoleValue to 0)
(set: $jonasValue to 0)
(set: $suzannahValue to 0)It took a lot longer for me to wake up the next time. My eyes felt like they’d been glued shut and I felt generally awful. My face was pressed against a pillow, and after I gradually came to consciousness, I figured it was the scratchiness of the pillowcase fabric that finally woke me up. With a groan, I turned over and sat up, swaying.
I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't this. I was in a square room, sterile and white, probably thirty feet on each side. The wall to my left had a long glass panel, like a viewing port—the other side had a door, slightly ajar, through which I could see a toilet.
“How are you feeling?”
I jumped at the crackling voice. No one was in the room, but the sound had come from the ceiling. There was a circular speaker up there, next to a recessed skylight, with midday light streaming through from what seemed like miles away.
[[Next|"Over here."]]“You don’t remember?” she replied.
I thought back, straining to find a shred of recent memory to guide me. Nothing was there, which made me panic.
"No."
The panic probably showed on my face, because she raised her hands in a calming gesture. “Hey, hey, it's ok. It usually takes a bit for your memories to come back. You just let me know when you remember, and until then, how about we just chat?”
I sat down on the floor mechanically.
She pulled up a stool and scooted all the way to the edge of the glass. That small kindness calmed me down a bit.
“My name's Suzannah," she said, still wearing a calming smile. "My job is to watch over you and make sure you’re doing ok. So, let's start with how you're feeling.”
[["I feel fine."|"I feel fine."]]
[["I feel sick."|Unwell]]
[["Wait, I remember something."|"I remember."]]No one answered me.
One of the masked people bent over me and there was a prick of pain in my arm. I reeled away, but before I knew it, everything was fuzzy and black.
[[Next|Afternoon 1]]Suzannah nodded, unphased. "Let's go through it step by step."
[[<i>Do I really remember?</i>|The truth]]
[[Fake it.|Fake it.]]"Oh, good," she said, and I could almost see surprise on her face. "That's a relief. You seem to be responding better than we hoped. Do you need anything?"
"Like what?" I asked.
"Are you hungry? Too cold? Are your clothes comfortable?"
For the first time, I looked down at myself. I was wearing cottony clothes that matched the whiteness of the room: long sleeves, long pants. White socks.
[["Let's talk about something else."|"Let's talk about something else."]]
[["I remember."|"I remember."]]"That's normal," she said, "and don't worry, it'll pass soon. It's just a natural result of the procedure. It'll get worse before it gets better, though."
Even as she said this, the feeling of nausea worsened. I registered it numbly.
Suzannah gave a small frown. "I'm sorry."
I shook my head. "It's fine," I said. My mouth felt like it was full of cotton. I tried to think of something else to say.
[["Tell me about yourself?"|"Tell me about yourself?"]]
[["Let's talk about something else."|"Let's talk about something else."]]
[["Wait, I remember."|"I remember."]]"Oh!" Suzannah gave me another small look of surprise. "How thoughtful of you. Um. Well, I'm a research assistant here. I rotate shifts with the other assistants, Nicole and Jasper. I've got the afternoon shift this month, Nicole's got the night shift, and Jasper's here in the mornings. There's other staff as well."
She looked uncomfortable talking about herself.
[["Go on."|"Tell me about yourself" cont.]]
[["Who's Nicole?"|"Who's Nicole?"]]
[["Who's Jasper?"|"Who's Jasper?"]]
[["Let's talk about something else."|"Let's talk about something else."]]
[["Wait, I remember."|"I remember."]]
(set: $suzannahValue to $suzannahValue + 1)She passed a hand over her face, clearly flustered. "Heh, I'm sorry. Sure. I'm getting my master's in bioinformatics. This is part of my final thesis. But in my spare time, I actually like rock climbing. I usually go with my brothers."
<i>Brothers.</i> That stirred a memory somewhere deep in my brain.
[["Let's talk about something else."]]
[["Who's Nicole?"|"Who's Nicole?"]]
[["Who's Jasper?"|"Who's Jasper?"]]
[["Wait, I remember."|"I remember."]]
(set: $suzannahValue to $suzannahValue + 1)"What do you want to talk about?" asked Suzannah.
[["Tell me about yourself."|"Tell me about yourself?"]]
[["Why is it so cold in here?"|"It's cold in here."]]
[["I remember now."|"I remember."]]"Oh, Nicole is the other assistant. You'll probably meet her tonight. Like I said, she's the night attendant for this month. She's getting her master's in biochemical engineering at the same school as me. She's a real film buff. She loves comics too."
Suspicion began to rise inside me. Why did I need an attendant 24/7? I scanned the room, looking for a door. There was a door-shaped panel in the corner of the room, right next to the glass viewport. It probably led to the room Suzannah was in, but there was no doorknob on this side.
[["What about Jasper?"|"Who's Jasper?"]]
[["Is there anyone else?"|"Is there anyone else?"]]
[["Let's talk about something else."]]
[["Wait, I remember."|"I remember."]]“Over here.”
A flicker of movement caught my eye from the glass wall. Woozily, I stood up and staggered over to see—something odd. It was like I was looking through a shop window, or out from a zoo enclosure. On the other side of the glass was a small room, full of panels, each with rows of blinking buttons, flickering readings and waves.
Standing in that small room was a tall and slender young woman, wavy light brown hair sticking out from a messy braid. She was wearing a lab coat, and she looked a little tired.
I must have been staring at her stupidly, with my mouth open, because she chuckled to herself. “Still asleep?” she asked, cracking a wan smile.
[["Where am I?"|"You don't remember?"]]
[["Who are you?"|"You don't remember?"]]
[["What's going on?"|"You don't remember?"]]"It's cold in here," I said, noting the temperature now.
Suzannah looked a bit embarassed. "I'm sorry. We have to keep the temp down to protect your immune system. For the next little while, you're going to be more suseptible to infection, so we can't take any chances to let anything grow in here. I can get you more blankets though. Would a jacket help?"
"Sure," I said.
"I'll see what I can do," she said. That encouraging smile was still there. It was starting to get...fishy.
[["Let's talk about something else."|"Let's talk about something else."]]
[["I remember now."|"I remember."]]"I came here because of an ad," I said slowly. "Something about free housing and free food for participating in a research study." It was coming back to me now. I'd been living on the street for the past year and things had been getting violent in my mean little corner of the world. Food and shoes were harder to come by—or rather, to keep hidden from the others.
That didn't even include the werewolf problem.
Wait, was that right?
Suzannah nodded brightly. "Exactly. What else?"
"I did a few tests. They said I was <i>compatible</i>." I paid attention to the way the word felt on my tongue. Compatible. Compatible?
Suzannah nodded again. "We need very specific kinds of people for this research. It's an investigative procedure. It's very...<i>particular</i>. We needed to make sure we had candidates who were already predisposed to accepting the neuro-muscular therapy."
[[Next|Silent 1]]"Yeah, I remember everything now."
"You had nowhere else to go, huh?" Suzannah said, a sympathetic look in her eyes now.
I just sat there, trying to think. It was starting to come back, but there was something else there too.
Suzannah flipped through a chart, but only barely, as if to make sure of something. "You were homeless, right? That must have been hard."
"Yeah," I agreed. <i>I was homeless?</i>
"Free food and housing is a pretty good deal, especially nowadays. The werewolves were pretty active in your part of town, weren't they?"
"Yeah," I said mechanically. There was something sticking in the gears of my brain. Something wasn't computing. Of course werewolves were in my part of town. What a joke.
Suzannah was looking at me intensely now. "What else do you remember?"
[[Say nothing.|Silent 2]]Suzannah cocked her head to the side just barely. "There's the professor. I mean, the doctor. Do you remember her? You met her before the procedure."
"What's she like?"
"She's..." Suzannah looked pointedly at the ceiling. I followed her gaze and saw a blinking red light on her side of the glass, right next to a small, mounted camera. She mouthed dramatically to me, <i>Later</i>.
[["Let's talk about something else."]]
[["I think I remember now."|"I remember."]]I just nodded. I didn't really understand.
"So what happened next?" she asked.
I strained to think. "I was here for a few weeks. And then..." Everything in my head strained out like water through sand. I sat there, mentally grasping at the shadows of <i>pieces</i> of memory that kept escaping.
I gave up. "I don't remember."
"You and a few other candidates were put into a medically induced coma while we waited for everything to be in order."
[[Next|Remember twice]]What is the point: Trying to create a strong, crafty, reasonably smart tool
-Start with werewolves
-Combine werewolves and vampires: the result is neurosis, poor judgement
-Adding dead people to Benjamin
-Punishment for past crime
-Combining Benjamin with other people who are loyal to government
-Adding animal DNA to enhance humanity: the result is neurosis, poor judgement
-Combining Benjamin with non-humans to see what sticks/make ideal combatantAs she said this, I remembered it: a bright and inviting hospital room with a big view of the grounds outside. It was summer, and I saw other researchers walking in the sun across manicured pathways to different buildings. Some people rode bikes, and that feeling of absolute purpose was something I'd never seen before. Then I remembered sleeping for a long time, safe and comfortable at last.
But I also remembered a different time, a different room, smaller and cramped. I didn't want to be there. I fought and bit and slashed and growled. I turned over tables, I almost made it through the window before they pinned me down. Then it was dark.
Without warning I shuddered violently and a wave of intense nausea crashed into me. I doubled over for just a second, almost kept it together, and dashed for the toilet after all. I ran and threw open the bathroom door, dropped—sliding across the floor—to my knees, and barely made it to the porcelain bowl.
"Doctor, it's—" I heard over the intercom from the other room before a crackling <i>click</i> cut off Suzannah's voice.
I didn't bother to look up, and instead heaved again.
[[Next|Look in mirror]]I opened my mouth but nothing came out. My brain was turning over and over. It was almost as if there was something looming, like the distant sound of a car speeding toward me, or the sound of rushing leaves before the wind actually hits you.
I wasn't supposed to be here. I remembered now. I'd been kidnapped!
Suzannah leaned back a bit. "I guess it's still hard to remember, isn't it? Don't feel bad. It'll come back to you, I promise. Anything you don't remember is probably a result of the medically induced coma you were under. All the subjects were put under in preparation for the procedure."
[[Next|Remember twice]]It looked like Suzannah swallowed uncomfortably. Maybe I imagined it.
"Oh. Um, they'll be in here soon to come take a look at you, now that you're awake. They can probably explain it a little better."
She stood up and moved away from the glass, and I had to stand up to see her again. I had just enough time to see her flip a switch, and there was an audible <i>click</i> on my end. I looked up at the ceiling speaker, straining my ears for any kind of feedback, but it was eerily silent in there, except for the sound of the blowing air conditioning.
She must have turned off the mic. I tested it: "Hey!"
She looked over at me, then looked away. So she could hear me, just not the other way around.After a little bit I stopped throwing up, and instead just lay there draped across the toilet. I eventually got the strength to reach up blindly for the flush, and then pushed myself onto my hands and knees. A few more seconds, breathing, and I got up into a crouch, and then stood. I found the sink and leaned over to wash my mouth out.
This was a familiar feeling. There were plenty of times I'd eaten something just a bit too rotten, whether from what I could find in the garbage or...
Huh. That thought made that same feeling loom over me, the one from before when something had felt off in my memory. I looked up at the mirror and had a small shock.
The person looking out at me wasn't right. He didn't look like either of me. <i>Either of me?</i> I straightened, feeling cold. Where had that thought come from?
I leaned in to the mirror. I looked halfway this, halfway that. I couldn't explain it. My face was both sharper and rounder than before. My eyes were darker, and paler. My skin was too light, and too dark. I was both younger, and older.
[[Next|Accuse]]I burst through the bathroom door back into the main area, with my wireframe bed in the corner and the long, rectangular viewport right ahead. In the small room beyond was more than just Suzannah; she was joined by probably five others, each in some variation of lab coat.
"What's going on?" I yelled. If they weren't all looking at me before, they were now. I saw them look back at each other and move their mouths, but no sound came through the intercom.
A tall woman with straight black hair moved closer to the glass, and there was another crackling <i>click</i> over the speaker. "How are you feeling?" she asked, leaning down and speaking directly into the microphone there.
"I feel like shit," I barked. "What's going on?" There was an unexpected rage there, that hadn't been there before. Maybe the puking had knocked some sense into me.
Behind the tall doctor, I heard Suzannah say, "He was pretty calm just a few minutes ago."
"It's probably the neurosis beginning," replied the doctor. "Suzannah, mark that down."
She went dutifully over to a chart.
[[Demand answers.|Demand answers.]]
[[Look for an escape.|Look for an escape.]]I took a ragged breath, trying to think, but the blood was rushing in my ears. "Tell me what's going on," I said, trying to sound reasonable, but there was a growl at the edge of my voice.
"Brian, would you read me the biodata from that screen over there?" the doctor asked someone else behind her. The man did as she said, reading off numbers I didn't understand.
The doctor peered over at the other. "How are his fluid levels? Do we need to intervene?"
"The nausea was more than likely a side effect, doctor. The genomes are probably just now setting up established links."
The doctor looked back at me. "We're going to get you some medicine with your meal to settle your stomach. Would that help?"
I stared, dumbfounded.
"I'm sorry, Mekko, you wanted to know what was going on." The doctor looked back at me. She was calm as ice.
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]Something or someone was screaming at me to get out of there. My heart suddenly racing, I scanned the room feverishly. Skylight above me, bathroom behind me. Bed to my left, glass viewport in front of me, the outline of a knobless door next to it on the right.
[[Try the skylight.|Skylight 1]]
[[Try the bed.|Bed 1]]
[[Try the bathroom.|Bathroom 1]]
[[Try the glass.|Glass 1]]
[[Try the door.|Door 1]]I was beginning to remember more, even if I didn't understand it.
One of me. One of me? One of me had come here willingly, even if I had been naive. Promise of food and housing in return for participation in medical research. Homeless and almost starving, I'd walked all the way across town, over and under highways, shoeless, just for the chance. I was so worried I wouldn't qualify and I'd be back on the street again, and so relieved when I was one of the few who passed.
The other one had been drugged and captured. I'd been doing my normal thing, skulking and listening, watching for news, when I was separated from my pack. I'd ended up in a cell in the basement, in and out of consciousness, until I woke up here.
Either way, we'd both ended up here, in the same place at the same time in the same person. Somehow.
[["What did you do to me?"|Put him out of his misery.]]
[["Get me out of here."|Put him out of his misery.]]The skylight was recessed several feet into the ceiling. How thick were these walls? Even if I jumped, I wouldn't be able to even touch the ceiling.
No, I probably could touch the ceiling, but not the pane of the window above.
[[Use the bed.|Bed+Skylight 1]]
[[Look again.|Look for an escape.]]I walked over to the bed, as rumpled as I left it. The frame was probably made of some sort of steel. I tapped on the metal—it wasn't completely hollow at least. There was some weight there. There was no way I'd be able to use it.
<i>No</i>, I thought again, <i>that's no problem.</i> I tested the weight of it and, even though part of me was surprised at how far I was able to move it with that small effort, the other part was disappointed it didn't go further.
But that didn't matter right now. I looked around—what on earth could I do with a bed?
[[Drag it toward the glass.|Bed+Glass 1]]
[[Drag it under the skylight.|Bed+Skylight 1]]
[[Look again.|Look for an escape.]]I turned and went back into the bathroom, searching for anything to help me.
It was completely spartan in there, and small. There was the sink closest to the door, with a rectangular mirror set into the wall right above it. Then the toilet, then a tiled area for a shower.
The only things that might help would be...
[[Investigate mirror.|Mirror 1]]
[[Investigate shower.|Shower 1]]
[[Back to the drawing board.|Look for an escape.]]I walked up to the glass, scanning it for any weaknesses, as the doctors talked around, about, and sometimes to me. I ignored them.
Up close, it probably wasn't glass at all, but some sort of amalgamation of glass and plastic. It wasn't cold to the touch. Bullet proof glass? Could I still smash it? It was worth a try.
[[Punch it.|Glass+Punch 1]]
[[Use the bed.|Bed+Glass 1]]
[[Look again.|Look for an escape.]]I walked to the door, which was more of a smooth continuation of the wall with the outline of a door. It reminded me of an airlock or the kind of drawer you press on first, then it opens. But there was no knob, keyhole, handle, or any means of operating it from this side.
[[Slam into it.|Door+slam 1]]
[[Look again.|Look for an escape.]]With a squeal of metal, I started dragging the heavy, steel-framed bed toward the skylight, and that got their attention.
"What are you doing?" the doctor asked exasperatedly.
I didn't answer. I turned the bed on its side, with the headboard facing upward, and climbed up onto it more deftly than I expected. Straightening, I was now several feet into the skylight well. If I jumped—carefully—I could probably throw myself the remaining few feet into the glass. Even if it took me a couple of tries, I could probably smash through.
"Calm down, Mekko," she said with a little laugh. "Let's talk."
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]
[[Keep going.|Bed+Skylight 2]]With a squeal of metal, I started dragging the heavy, steel-framed bed toward the glass viewing panel, and that got their attention.
"What are you doing?" the doctor asked exasperatedly.
I didn't answer. Instead, I lifted the bed up onto its side, with the wire headboard facing upward. I tested pivoting it back and forth, aiming it. If I shoved it hard enough into the glass, I could probably damage it, even if it were some sort of polymer. Enough times, and it had to break.
"Calm down, Mekko," she said with a little laugh. "Let's talk."
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]
[[Keep going.|Bed+Glass 2]]Looking closer at the mirror, I noticed it had to be some sort of plastic polymer. I tapped it with my claw—finger nail. Yeah, that wasn't glass. Could I still use it?
[[Use it as a wedge?|Mirror+Door 1]]
[[Look at the bathroom again.|Bathroom 1]]
[[Back to the drawing board.|Look for an escape.]]I stepped into the shower, searching feverishly. I probably didn't have much time. The "showerhead" was really just a square of metal, full of holes, set into the ceiling, and there was no way I'd be able to get my claws—nails—under it to prize if off. At least not without more time and a lot of smashing.
There weren't any knobs either, just inscruitable buttons on the wall. This was a bust.
[[Look at the bathroom again.|Bathroom 1]]
[[Back to the drawing board.|Look for an escape.]]I managed to get my fingers underneath the mirror and pried it carefully off the wall. It looked like it had been stuck there with some sort of ceramic glue. Strong stuff, but not with a little patience.
I went back into the main room and sized up the door. When they saw the small mirror in my hand, the room beyond got quiet.
There was a crack where the wall ended and the panel started. It was a hell of a long shot, but if I got lucky, maybe I could pry open the door just enough to squeeze through.
I crouched down to inspect the seam.
"Calm down, Mekko," the doctor said with a little laugh. "Let's talk."
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]
[[Keep going.|Mirror+Door 2]]I clenched my fist. This was <i>not</i> going to work.
"Are you ready to talk, Mekko?" the doctor asked, with a forced air of sweetness and a hint of superiority.
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]
[[Keep going.|Glass+Punch 2]]I sized up the door. It didn't actually look that hard. Reaching out a hand, I tried to size up the material. It was probably another polymer. I pushed the door, first with both hands, then with my shoulder. I tried to get my fingers in the seam between it and the wall.
"Calm down, Mekko," the doctor said with a little laugh. "Let's talk."
[["What did you call me?"|"What did you call me?"]]
[[Keep going.|Door+slam 2]]I stared at the black-haired doctor. "What did you just call me?" That wasn't my name. That wasn't either of my names—at least, I didn't think it was.
"Mekko is what we've been calling you," she replied. "It's the name of this project. It's an acronym—but, eh, it doesn't actually matter. Let's just talk."
[[Talk|I was beginning to remember more.]]I jumped, now suddenly clumsy, and the bed fell out from under me, unstable as it was. I crashed into the skylight, which only reverberated with a deep thrumming, and was sent back to earth. There was a clang as I fell partly on the mattress, partly on the frame, only to roll off onto the floor.
I groaned and looked up at the light. It looked perfectly fine. With my luck, the glass panel between me and the staff was probably made of the same impenetrable stuff.
[[Next|You absolute moron.]]The doctor took off her glasses and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Ugh, just put him out of his misery. We'll try this again later."
Through the glass, I saw Suzannah walk over to another panel. She gave me a guilty look before activating something.
I heard some sort of <i>clunk</i> disrupt the air conditioning. I jumped, crouching low, searching for the source of the sound. From an air vent I hadn't noticed before on the ceiling, some sort of cloudy pink smoke came seeping through. It seemed to sink and cling to the floor like ooze, but that didn't stop it from billowing outward at an alarming rate. Instantly I smelled it—they'd used this on me before.
Panic tightened in my chest. I scrambled away. "No," I yelled, "shut it off! Shut it off!"
I tried to hold my breath, but even I knew it was useless. Eventually I had to gasp for air, and when I did, things grew instantly hazy. I dropped to my knees, and then to all fours, and then...
[[I gave up.|Evening 1]]I woke up in the dark with my mouth numb. I groaned again, that feeling of nauseousness back with a vengance. It was everything I could do not to lean off the side of the bed and puke on the floor.
I gradually remembered where I was, and with that came a profound sense of dread. Almost immediately that dread was replaced with rage that seemed to come from outside, swallowing up everything else. I jumped out of bed and reached down for the frame, intending to throw it across the room, but the bed resisted.
"What?" I muttered, and crouched down. In the darkness I could just barely see that the legs of the bed had been bolted down—they definitely weren't earlier.
I went to the bathroom. It was too dark to see anything but my silhouette, but I noted a new mirror, this time protected by a veneer of that terrible glass polymer. I growled. They weren't taking any chances that I'd get creative.
Back in the main room, I stood in the pool of moonlight in the center of the floor. Rage battled with dread and despair. The air vent that had spewed such filth before glinted at me coldly.
[[Next|Introduce Nicole]]I got behind the bed, with the headboard facing toward the glass like a battering ram.
One...
Two...
Three!
I slammed my shoulder into the underside of the bed, propeling it forward into the glass. Instantly it bounced off, and the force transfered back onto me, and my vision was full of steel.
I must have blacked out for a few seconds, because I found myself pinned on the floor, under the bed. I groaned. My head felt like it had grown twice its size, throbbing in rhythm, pulsing with pain. My right cheek and temple felt numb.
[[Next|You absolute moron.]]"You absolute moron!" yelled the doctor. "Is anything broken?"
Before I had a chance to answer, one of her staff replied in the negative. Figures they'd know. What kind of monitoring equipment did they have hidden away?
I struggled to get up, aching. Through the glass, the doctor was giving me a measured look.
"Are you happy now? Did you get that out of your system?"
[["Start explaining!"|Put him out of his misery.]]
[["What did you do to me?"|Put him out of his misery.]]
[["Let me go."|Put him out of his misery.]]I ignored her and wedged the corner of the mirror into the seam of the door and the wall. Then I tentatively bent back on the mirror. Even as it flexed, I knew this was a bad idea, but anxiety and the distant sound of howling in my head urged me on.
"Stop it," the doctor said, "You know that's not going to work." There were panicked voices coming over the speaker now.
Heart pumping, I kept pulling back. I adjusted my grip, wedged it in a little further, pulled back, repeat—until the mirror snapped in my hands and sharp plastic shards exploded outward.
The lack of resistance from the now broken mirror caused me to careen back and hit the floor. I could feel the cuts on my hands and face starting to bleed.
[[Next.|You absolute moron.]]Hiding a wince, I pulled back my fist and slammed it into the glass. The glass-plastic-polymer repelled me, bouncing my fist back so hard it strained my shoulder. With a gasp I fell back, cradling my hand, and went to my knees.
I'd put everything I had into that punch. My knuckles pulsed with pain, red and already swelling.
[[Next|You absolute moron.]]Ignoring her, I drew back and slammed the door with my shoulder, with more and more force. After a few attempts at this, I started getting a running start, slamming into the door again and again until my shoulder ached.
This was not going to work. The door just wouldn't give.
[[Next|Put him out of his misery.]]The glass panel on the wall in front of me was dark, but I knew there had to be someone in there. I was awake now, so they might as well be. I squared my shoulders and said, "Hey." When there was no response, I tried again, louder. "Hey!"
The surface of the glass changed, kind of dissolving until I could see a warm, dim light from the other side. There was just one person back there, sitting in the corner, reading a pretty big book.
"Who are you?" I asked.
She smiled, her feet upon one of the machines. "I'm Nicole. You feeling better after your freakout?"
Nicole was young, the same age as Suzannah. Probably my age. She was pretty—sturdy but curvy, with a cat-like face and big, curly hair. She was wearing a thick sweater under her labcoat, with some sort of pop culture logo on the front.
[[Next|Get Food]]I suddenly felt ravenous. It must have been ages since I'd last eaten solid food, probably before I—we—got put into that coma. Before the procedure. All of my questions temporarily flew out the window. "I'm hungry," I told her, and it came out as a gasp.
<i>Oh, god.</i> I was so hungry.
She got off her chair and walked toward the handle-less door to my cell. I felt a spark of hope before I saw a slot open about midway up, with a tray of food sitting inside. Still, I didn't waste any time running and grabbing it.
I had to sit on the floor to eat it, but it was mouthwateringly delicious. Soft bread, tender beef, cold water. I even ate the vegetables, and I'm pretty sure I used to hate them. The meal was so sweet, and it was over too quickly. I was still hungry.
"Don't forget to take that nausea pill," Nicole said from the other room.
I noted a couple of capsules in a compartment on the side of the cup. (cycling-link: bind $pills1, "I took them.", "I hid them.")
[[Next|Get Answers]]When I was done, Nicole was back on her chair in the corner, reading her book. She glanced up at me, then back down at the pages. "You want answers?" she asked. "Go for it. They don't record autio at night, only video."
I thought for a moment, wondering if this was a trick. But there didn't seem to be any way I'd get in more trouble, just Nicole—and that was her problem.
[["Ok," I began. "For starters..."|What do I want to know?]]Nicole flipped a page in her book.
[["What happened to me?"|"What happened to me?" Nicole]]
[["Where am I?"|"Where is this?" Nicole]]
[["When can I leave?"|"When can I leave?" Nicole]]
[["Why are you here?"|"Why are you here?" Nicole]]
[["Why didn't they give me a table?"|"Why don't I have a table?" Nicole]]
[["I'm done."|"That's it."]]Nicole sighed and shifted in her chair. "You didn't read the paperwork, huh?"
I just laughed. That sounded like such a stupid response. Paperwork. The idea felt a thousand miles away—I only had a fleeting memory of signing things when I began the study. Besides, neither of me was a legal scholar by any means. I wasn't even a strong reader.
"You know, the paperwork? The ones <i>you signed</i>. Well, I guess one of you signed it, anyway."
[["What do you mean, 'one of you'?"]]"This is a government-funded genetic research facility," she replied, "a few miles outside the city. Same one you stayed at before, just a different building. 'Member?"
I had a vague idea. I remembered one of me walking here by choice. The other of me hadn't had clue a where he was. That was valuable information—at least I knew where I was, and had a decent idea of the area, if I managed to escape.
[["I have more questions."|What do I want to know?]]Nicole looked at me over her book. "You're serious?"
She looked at the clock hanging above her, then stopped herself and shook her head. "Oh my god, I am <i>so sorry</i>, I don't know why I did that. It probably seems like I'm making fun of you but I promise it was just habit.
"Um, I'm really not sure. My first instinct is to say, definitely not in the forseeable future. Maybe never."
Shock, like a sack of bricks. "What does that mean?" I asked, anger building.
"I'm sorry, you're valuable government property. You're one of our <i>only</i> successful subjects. Everyone else pretty much died."
She returned to her book.
[["I have more questions."|What do I want to know?]]I walked to the bed and sat down again. Rage and despair kept warring inside me. I was beginning to understand what Nicole had meant when she said there were two of me. It was as if I was coming out of a fog, or the coma was finally over. There was two of me. If I tried really hard, I thought I might be able to talk to myself.
The thought made me chuckle.
"Hey, what were my names?" I asked suddenly.
Natalie glanced over at some papers, just like Suzannah had before—the kind of glance you do to make sure, even though you already know. "Your name is/was Benjamin. You didn't give us a last name." She leaned forward, finally putting her book down. "...Oh, the werewolf! Sorry, yeah, I think his name was Cameron. His pack name was Coyote."
The names set off a spark in me. I said them under my breath.
[["Benjamin."|Benjamin]]
[["Cameron."|Cameron]]Nicole started bouncing her foot, still propped up on a panel full of flashing charts and buttons. She sighed. "Well poop, I didn't think I'd have to explain <i>everything</i> to you. I thought you already knew that at least.
"Project Mekko is all about pushing the limits of humanity. That became more important—or maybe, more interesting—when the city started having its werewolf problems. Basically, we took your human body and mind, and...dumped in a werewolf's body and mind as well.
"From our initial research, you'll only experience cognitive dissonance in the beginning. After a while, in your brain, it'll be easier and I guess also harder to parse your memories. It'll all kind of be one you.
"You'll notice your body changing too. You'll get stronger—I guess only your human half will get stronger? Either way, you'll get stronger than you are now as your body absorbs and processes the genetic data. Your features will change, maybe your eyes will change color or yada yada. We're still in the research stage, so I can't really tell you for sure."
[[Next|One of you cont.]]I stared at her, mind reeling. I felt that nausea swell up again. All at once I wanted to reach inside me and tear myself apart—I wanted to claw my way out of this horror-shit show.
"Why?" I stammered stupidly.
"Why what?"
"Why not just infect a human?"
"With lycanthropy?" she asked, and shook her head. "A few reasons.
<ol><li>Infecting a human doesn't give us the ability to understand werewolf cultural and societal norms. This method lets us have a greater likelihood of a cooperative source of information.</li><li>We wanted to test the limits of the research and the technology. If this works with a human and a werewolf, would it work with other hybrids, especially races where the subject doesn't share the base genetic code with the target?</li><li>How can we manipulate the genetic code of the subject and the target to produce desired results, not just "come what may"?</li><li>How does this affect the memories and capabilities of both parties? Can we create a person with the shared experiences of multiple people? The applications of that are pretty boundless in terms of military, research, and performance settings.</li></ol>
"Et cetera, et cetera. That's what they tell me anyway. I'm just an assistant <i>on the night shift</i>," she said said in a mocking tone. I just barely caught her roll her eyes.
I sat there, my mouth agape.
[["I still have more questions."|What do I want to know?]]
[["That's it."|"That's it."]]"This is my thesis project. Well, I'm not in charge, obviously. I'm just a grad student. I just got swept up in the whole thing, I guess.
"Sorry I'm kind of contributing to the collapse of your life and freedom and everything." She hid herself behind her book. "You did sign the paperwork, though. You do what you have to, I guess. For, um, science."
[["I still have more questions."|What do I want to know?]]
[["That's it."|"That's it."]]
(set: $nicoleValue to $nicoleValue + 1)"Oh, that. I'm not sure! They probably figured you could get up to extra mayhem with a table and chairs and stuff. I bet they could probably build you a desk or something, though—one you can't chuck at the walls." Natalie chuckled quietly to herself. "Just ask nicely. They'll probably give you whatever you want. They've already spent enough money on you; what's a desk going to add to the overhead?"
<i>Whatever I want,</i> I thought, my mouth twisting.
[["I still have more questions."|What do I want to know?]]
[["That's it."|"That's it."]]"Benjamin."
I remembered sitting on what used to be a blanket, staring at what was left of my meager posessions. A flashlight that had long since run out of juice. Three torn socks. A book missing half of its pages.
I was tucked away in the bowels of an unfinished concrete building. I figured it was either the remains of some derelict structure, or a project that never got finished. Either way, it was still falling apart. A lot of people lived here, since no one bothered to chase us away.
In my hand I clutched the flyer I'd found earlier that day. It could be my way out. The worst that coud happen was I died, and that was probably happening here any day now. Between the werewolves and the other desperate people here, I wasn't going to last long.
Looking back, I realized how pitiful I'd been. Mom died early, Dad left. Pale and scrawny from too much hiding and not enough fighting. I wasn't willing or able to fend for myself—I'd been too soft. That's how I'd ended up here.
[["Cameron."|Cameron]]
[[Forget about it.|Move on]]"Cameron."
I remembered crouching in an alleyway, keeping watch for the family. The sun was yellow and warm, even this far down in the bowels of town. The pack was having a meeting and I was stuck out here—but at least I was doing something important. Could be worse.
On my rounds, having a smoke, I caught a glimpse of myself in a shop window that had been broken as long as I'd been there. I was dark—dark hair, dark eyes, dark skin. Made me hard to trace in the shadows. With all the grime in this part of town, I didn't stick out.
Someone had been taking out members of the family, one by one. The family was big, these things happened. But it was too organized. We had to be on our guard.
[["Benjamin."|Benjamin]]
[[Forget about it.|Move on]]<i>If you hadn't taken the easy way out, we wouldn't be here,</i> I found myself thinking. <i>We'd be free.</i>
<i>Me? If I hadn't jumped at the chance, </i>I'd<i> be free. You'd still be stuck here.</i>
"Change me back," I said to Nicole.
Nicole scoffed. "You don't know how this works, do you."
"I'm no use to them as two people."
"No, that's <i>literally</i> and <i>physically</i> impossible. There's literally no way to split you apart. The wolf's body is gone anyway."
Part of me shrunk in horror, the other part had a spark of hope. "Dump the werewolf—" I almost strangled myself trying to complete the sentence.
Nicole scoffed again. "No, we literally can't. Give it up, you're stuck this way. Besides, isn't this better than dying on the streets? For both of you, I guess, I don't know."
[[Next|Morning 2]]My sleep schedule was all messed up. I couldn't get to sleep after being knocked out for hours, but there was absolutely nothing to do. I spent the time crosslegged on the bed, going back and forth with myself, trying to remember what I could. Funnily enough, I knew I had all the memories in there somewhere—but only half of me had half the information, and vise versa. I did this until the clock in the other room said it was well into the early morning.
(if: $pills1 is "I hid them.")[That is, after puking a couple more times. Why didn't I take those pills?]
I still got up early, though. My nerves were keeping me alert. I must not have been sleeping for very long, because I saw Nicole leave and someone else take her place, a freckled man with multiple ear piercings. 24 hours in a day? They probably pulled 8 hour shifts.
I went to the bathroom to check the mirror and found a lightswitch I hadn't noticed before. I flipped it on and inspected myself.
[[Next|Look in mirror 2]]My skin was complicated-looking now. I wasn't sure how else to describe it. I lifted my shirt, rolled up my sleeves, pulled out my waistband, to check where I could. Some patches were lighter, others darker. The effect was kind of mottled, but the patches were close enough in shade that it wasn't too stark. Why was it doing that? What else had changed?
[[Check if the door's closed|Check Jonas]]Suddenly self conscious, I checked to the left to see if I'd closed the bathroom door. I looked through the open door, toward the observation panel, and saw that the attendant had paused in his settling in to lean against the glass, looking at me. When our eyes met, he gave me a smirk and a wave.
[["What are you looking at?"|"What are you looking at?"]](if: $playingDoctor is "I blushed.")[Jonas laughed raucously as I slammed the door. This was going to be a long morning. <br>]I looked around the bathroom for cameras, but this area, at least, was private. Now that the door was closed, I leaned closer into the mirror and tried to find any other distinguishable differences. <ol><li>My eyes looked lighter than they had yesterday. They were kind of a watery hazel now.</li><li>My hair wasn't much different though, and my nails were still weak—not as strong as they had been before. <i>That'll probably change,</i> one of me thought darkly.</li><li>I tested my strength with exercises I'd done with my brothers. Not strong enough, but also, much stronger? One of me yearned to get my old body back, but the other was impressed.</li></ol>
[[But I knew I couldn't stay in here forever.|I couldn't stay in here forever.]]"What are you looking at?" I asked sharply.
The man was probably in his twenties, same as the others had been. How old was I? Probably about the same? I wasn't sure. How old had the two of me been? One of us had been their age, the other had been younger, maybe a teenager. Which one was it?
The attendant leaned toward the microphone, tapped it a couple of times, and said, "You. Who else? I'm sorry, I'm Jonas."
[["Buzz off."|"Why are you looking at me?"]]
[[Close the door.|Hair+Eyes+Body]]"Buzz off already," I muttered. I unconsciously smoothed out my shirt. He was making my hackles raise.
"It's my job, isn't it? To watch you?" he laughed. The way he just stood there, his bag still over his arm and his coffee still in his hand, made me hate him.
[["Who are you?"|Who is Jonas]]
[[Close the door.|Hair+Eyes+Body]]
(set: $jonasValue to $jonasValue + 1)"And which one are you supposed to be?" I asked, getting tired of this. Suzannah had probably mentioned other people.
The attendant finally started putting down his coffee and settling down in a chair. "I'm here to take care of you in the mornings. You know, breakfast in bed. How do you take your coffee? If I'd known before, I would have brought you one."
[[Ignore that.|Also a master's student]]
[[Close the door.|Hair+Eyes+Body]]I ignored that. I had two different answers anyway. "Let me guess, you're also a master's student studying something god-awful?" I was surrounded by genius idiots who probably never got dirt under their nails or blood on their snout.
"I'm in medical school, actually. Genetic therapy research mostly. I still get to play doctor, though, if you're interested."
My reaction? (cycling-link: bind $playingDoctor, "I rolled my eyes.", "I blushed.", "I stared at him blankly. Was that a joke?")
[[Finally, I closed the door.|Hair+Eyes+Body]]"Jasper is here in the mornings. He's a med student focusing on genetic therapy research. He's, uh... a character," she chuckled weakly. "I don't know him that well."
[["What about Nicole?"|"Who's Nicole?"]]
[["Is there anyone else?"|"Is there anyone else?"]]
[["Let's talk about something else."]]
[["Wait, I remember."|"I remember."]]I'd have to come out of the bathroom sometime. Although, I realized with dread that there was literally nothing for me to do. I'd go out there and, what, sit there? Talk to the attendant? Do more push ups?
I had a feeling the doctor and the rest of the staff would be back today. They didn't want to deal with me yesterday, during my panic. Would they just knock me out again if I caused more trouble?
Either way, I had to be smart about my next move.
I dragged myself back into the main room, Jonas watching. With a sigh I looked over my sparse surroundings. All I had was the bed.
[[Lie down and wait.|Lie down and wait]]
[[Get creative.|Mattress to skylight]]I went back to the bed and lay down with a sigh. When I saw the attendant looking at me, I rolled my eyes.
[[Wait it out.|The doctors arrive Day 2]]
(set: $mattressLocation to "bed")Even if the bed was bolted to the floor... I pulled the mattress off of the frame, dragging the pillow, sheets, and blankets along with it, and positioned it under the skylight.
I lay down and sighed, ready to wait it out. The sky was still gray with morning, but color was beginning to come to it now, through what little patch of sky I could see. It seemed like I was staring up from the bottom of a sewer, an incredibly clean sewer, but no ladders in sight.
From the speaker, I heard Jonas, evidently impressed, say, "Smart."
[[Wait it out.|The doctors arrive Day 2]]
(set: $mattressLocation to "skylight")It was probably 9:00 a.m. when the whole team showed up again. I looked up from the {(if: $mattressLocation is "skylight")[floor](else:)[bed]} and prepared myself for the worst as they all filtered in. Jonas was greeting them all with nauseatingly self-assured confidence, and I watched as, one by one, they responded to him positively.
The same tall, black-haired doctor from before gave me a glance before checking some numbers, asking some questions, and whatnot. Yep, Jonas was handing her a coffee. What a kiss ass.
She finally turned her full attention to me, and I saw the other staff queue up in a gaggle behind her, watching carefully. (cycling-link: "I rolled my eyes.", "I waited.")
{(if: $mattressLocation is "skylight")["Mekko, why is your mattress on the floor?" she asked.](else:)["How was your night?" she asked.]}
[[Next|Conversation with Doctor 1]]"What's up?" I replied, "you gunna knock me out again?"
She smiled emotionlessly at me. "I'm sorry about that. That must have been a shock. How would you prefer we manage your next outburst? Maybe with a shock?" She turned, covering the microphone with a hand and addressing someone behind her. "Pull up the files for the remote-activated taser chip we discussed."
[["Like hell you will."|Don't back down]]
[["Wait, hold on."|Cower]]"Like hell you will," I replied. "You'll have to come and get me first."
She gave a small laugh. "You do realize you're not the one in power here, don't you? How about we start with how you feel today?"
"Pissed off!" I stood. "There's literally nothing to do. And where's my breakfast(click-prepend: "breakfast")[goddamn ]?"
[[Next|Remember or not]]
(set: $challenge1 to "Don't back down")"Wait, hold on," I said, losing steam. This war between rage and fear inside me was getting old, but this time the fear won.
The doctor leveled her gaze at me. "Are you ready to cooperate?"
"Sure." I sat up, trying to look reasonable. "Look, it's just that there's nothing here for me to do. All I've got is a bed and a bathroom, and I haven't had breakfast yet today."
[[Next|Remember or not]]
(set: $challenge1 to "Cower")A beat of quiet, and everyone in the room turned to Jonas. His face paled and he rushed off, {(if: $challenge1 is "Don't back down")[with me chuckling in his wake](else:)[with me just relieved to have dodged the pressure]}.
The doctor turned back to me. "Your breakfast will be here in just a moment. Honestly, it's his job to get it to you right when you wake up. Nutrition is literally in the job description."
She pulled up a notepad. "Before we get started, do you remember me?"
[["Yes."|Remember the doctor]]
[["No."|Don't remember the doctor]]"Yeah," I muttered. "You're Doctor Xiao. You were there both times."
She wrote a note. "And what do you remember about those times?"
"In one, you interviewed me and let me know when I was accepted into the trials. In the other, you inspected me through the bars of my cell. Either way, you were there at all of my tests."
Doctor Xiao nodded. "Good work. Memory is stitching nicely. How about your musculature? Your body?"
[[Stay silent.|Body Silence]]
[[Answer.|Body Answer]]
[[End this.|"Can we move on?"]]"I don't remember shit," I muttered.
She made a note. "Is that true?"
I shrugged. "I'm remembering a lot, but you're not in there."
She gave me another steady, calculating look, clicking and unclicking her pen with one hand and drumming her fingers against the back of ner notepad with the other.
She must have figured I wasn't lying: "My name is Doctor Xiao. I'm in charge of your development. We've already met, but how do you do."
I jerked my chin forward in response. This was weird.
"How about your musculature? Your body?"
[[Stay silent.|Body Silence]]
[[Answer.|Body Answer]]
[[End this.|"Can we move on?"]]I didn't answer, and she made an exasperated expression. "Mekko, we're going to find out one way or another."
(cycling-link: "I looked away pointedly.", "I dropped my gaze.")
"Are you still experiencing nausea?"
[[Answer.|Nausea?]]
[[End this.|"Can we move on?"]]I yawned. "I don't know. I look like a damn mutt."
"That's plain to see."
"Look, I'm stronger than I was and I'm weaker than I was. I don't know what you want me to say."
"I guess it's still too early to tell," she muttered, making another note. "Are you still experiencing nausea?"
[[Answer.|Nausea?]]
[[End this.|"Can we move on?"]]{(if: $pills1 is "I took them.")["Not since the first night."](else:)["Yeah."]}
She made another note.
[[End this.|"Can we move on?"]]"Oh, I suppose you have questions for me, then?" Doctor Xiao said, setting down her notepad. "Better be quick about it."
[["Yeah, I do."|Questions for Xiao]]
[["No."|Breakfast arrives]]She waited.
[["What happens now?"|Explain routine]]
[["What the point?"|What's the point]]
[["You're not getting away with this."|Human rights]]
[[Threaten Xiao|Threaten Xiao 1]]
[[Move on.|Breakfast arrives]]"I've got nothing else to say."
Just then, Jonas came rushing back into the room, bearing a tray. I perked up at that, my stomach giving a rumble. With a flurry of apologies, Jonas disappeared behind the wall, and a moment later the hatch on the door slid open, my tray inside.
I bolted forward, grabbed it, and started on it immediately, kneeling on the floor. Once again, the meal was balanced, with what I could only guess were healthy sources of protein, fat, carbs, and water. There were the nausea pills again, and some vitamins.
(cycling-link: bind $pills2, "I took them.", "I hid them.")
"Why don't I have a table or a desk or something?" I asked in between bites.
"That was a conscious decision. We thought you might feel more comfortable on the floor."
"Benjamin was the homeless gutter rat—<i>I</i> ate at a table," I barked.
There was a smattering of chuckling behind the glass(click-append: "glass")[, which made my blood boil].
[[I threw the tray at them.|Throw tray]]
[[I took it calmly.|End the morning 1]]"So I'm just going to rot in here until I die?" I asked ruefully.
"Goodness, no. For the next few months, you <i>will</i> mostly spend your time in your room, where we can observe your health and progress. As you can see behind me, we have the resources to remotely monitor almost every bodily function or brain pattern, even circadian rhythms.
"Periodically, you'll be removed to participate in exercises to test your growth. These might be tests of strength, endurance, logic, or whatever else is applicable at each stage of development."
[[Ask something else.|Questions for Xiao]]
[[Move on.|Breakfast arrives]]"What's the point of all this?" I gestured around me.
"Next question," she said curtly.
[[Ask something else.|Questions for Xiao]]
[[Move on.|Breakfast arrives]]"There's no way this is legal," I said.
Xiao rolled her eyes. "Look, you signed the paperwork. Even if you prattle on to me about <i>human rights,</i> there's two problems with that. One, you're not human anymore. Two, werewolves were never covered under city law. So, no, legally, we're just fine."
[[Ask something else.|Questions for Xiao]]
[[Move on.|Breakfast arrives]]"When I get out of here," I began, a growl rising in the back of my throat.
"You'll rip my throat out," she sang. "I'm so afraid! If you get out, it would be my own fault, wouldn't it? Let's leave that for if it happens."
[[Ask something else.|Questions for Xiao]]
[[Move on.|Breakfast arrives]]With a grunt I hucked the metal tray at the glass, making them all jump in <i>such</i> a satisfying way. What I didn't expect was for the tray to bend the way it did after impact.
Everyone was silent, looking at the dented steel.
"Interesting," Xiao said softly.
[[Next|End the morning 1]]Xiao promised me they'd get me some stuff to do, and a desk, the next time I was out of the room long enough for them to install it. Then she, Jonas, and the other staff talked for a while with the mic off so I couldn't hear.
<i>You're going to ruin this for us,</i> I thought with a sweat.
I laughed. <i>Me? There's nothing to ruin, you little rat.</i>
<i>Provoking them isn't going to help us get out of here.</i>
<i>No, but neither will licking their boots. The only thing that's going to get us out of here is me, and I don't need you getting in my way, so stay back--or better yet, disappear.</i>
{(if: $pills2 is "I took them.")[A wave of nausea passed over me again, but I fought it down. Resolve made me stronger than steel.](else:)[I stood there, resolve making me strong, and I saw myself braving the storm around me like I was cast from steel.<br>Then I had to run to puke again.]}
[[The afternoon|Afternoon 2]]Jonas left around lunchtime, replaced by Suzannah. She greeted me brightly when she came in, setting down her things and checking the equipment.
"How are you feeling today?" she asked. "Have a good night with Nicole and Jonas?"
She didn't forget about my lunch, which I was grateful for.
[[I talked with her a while.|Talk to Suzannah]]
[[I ignored her for the day.|Ignore Suzannah]]I humored her during that shift. She didn't have a lot to say, but she seemed content to throw ideas back and forth, telling me about her day so far, and her dog, and her brother, whenever it came up. It was dull.
[[Next|Receive Jacket]]
(set: $suzannahValue to $suzannahValue + 1)She tried several times to engage me in conversation, but I mostly ignored her. I had too much to try to plot out. After a while she stopped trying, pulling out what I could only guess were study materials.
[[Next|Receive Jacket]]
(set: $suzannahValue to $suzannahValue)"Oh, by the way," Suzannah said towards the end of her shift. "I'm sorry I didn't remember earlier. I picked this up for you on my way here this morning."
The hatch opened. As I crossed cautiously toward it, she continued, "It's nothing much, but hopefully it keeps you a little warmer in here."
In the hatch was a neatly folded red hoodie, with thick fabric. It looked expensive. This thing could take some abuse.
[[I was actually a little taken aback.|Thanks for jacket]]
[["Is this supposed to make me feel better?"|No thanks for jacket]]
(set: $reluctantJacket to false){(if: $reluctantJacket is true)[I sighed. "Fine." It wasn't really all that bad of a gesture. I guess I was jumpy. ](else:)[A little bit unbelieving, ]}I picked it up and ran my hands across it, feeling the soft inner lining, the sturdy zipper. I put it on almost immediately, and it made me feel somehow...secure.
<i>Don't cry, rat.</i>
"Thank you," I told her.
"No problem, Mekko." She said, softly.
[[Evening|Evening 2]]
(set: $suzannahValue to it + 1)"What's this supposed to do? Is this some sort of truce?" I asked, drawing away from it.
A look of dismay wrinkled Suzannah's face. "No! You said you were cold."
"Why'd you buy it with your own money? They would have given me one."
"I just--" she stammared. "I wanted to help you."
[[Swallow my pride.|Thanks for jacket]]
[["I don't need this."|Refuse jacket]]
(set: $reluctantJacket to true)The evening rolled around again and Suzannah left. Whether I wanted it or not, I was wearing the red hoodie. After all, no matter who had what opinion on it, it gave both of us the slightest sense of control over ourselves. Not to mention how comfortable it was.
Nicole was there now, and gave me my dinner. At my request, she kept the light screen turned off, so I could see what she was doing at all times. I didn't need any more invisible eyes than I could help.
"Have a good time with everyone today?" Nicole asked with a smirk. "You met Jonas, huh?"
[[I humored her.|Talk to Nicole]]
[[I ignored her.|Ignore Nicole]]"I don't need this," I insisted. "You can wear it for all I care."
Suzannah looked hurt, but she tried to hide it by looking away. "That's fine," she chuckled. "You should keep it though, just in case it gets really cold.
She managed to push the jacket all the way through the hatch, so that it fell crumpled on the floor.
[[Evening|Evening 2]]
(set: $suzannahValue to it - 1)"He's terrible," I said.
"Really?" Nicole asked. "I think he's pretty funny! And very fashionable."
I didn't know what to say to that.
[[Next|Nicole question evening 2]]
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]
(set: $nicoleValue to it + 1)Nicole didn't make too many efforts at conversation. Once I didn't answer her a few times, she left me alone. At one point, she must have turned on the microphone, because I could see her singing to herself to music I couldn't hear, still turning the pages of that big book.
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]"Hey, did you want to ask a question? The audio's off now."
[["What's going on tomorrow?"|Day 3 Plan]]
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]The next morning, I lay in bed wondering if I even wanted to deal with another attendant, much less Jonas.
[[Get out of bed.|Talk to Jonas]]
[[Pretend to be asleep.|Ignore Jonas]]Nicole checked a schedule. "Tomorrow you've got a fitness exercise, I think."
"What does that mean?"
"There's a space they set up for tests like these. They'll give you space to run, weights to lift, stuff like that."
[["How will they transport me there?"|Transport]]
[["What if I don't cooperate?"|Resist during test]]
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]"But how do I get out of here, into there?"
Nicole chuckled. "Probably a couple of options there. If you resist, they'll probably make you. If you don't, they won't."
At my withering stare, she perked up. "Oh, sorry. I think they have a kind of transport buggy they use for the subjects. Either way, you'll almost definitely be restrained."
[["What if I don't cooperate?"|Resist during test]]
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]"During the test?" she asked. "They'll probably force you to somehow. I'm not sure why you're even asking this question."
[[Go to bed.|Morning 3]]Grudgingly I got out of bed. Jonas was there--he'd probably been there since 4:00 a.m., if I was right about their schedules. When he saw me staring blankly at him, he brightened and put a mocking hand on his cheek.
"Sleeping beauty is awake! And she didn't even need a kiss."
[["Where's my coffee?"|where's my coffee]]
[[This wasn't worth it.|Jonas not worth it]]This wasn't worth it. Rolling my eyes, I turned around and got back in bed, with Jonas protesting loudly over the intercom. Even when I ignored him, he kept jabbering away like an idiot.
<i>Please, god, bring me earplugs.</i>
[[Next|Check in the mirror day 3]]"Where's my coffee?"
That made Jonas pause and genuinely laugh. "I can't believe you remembered that," he said, passing a hand over his eyes. "Did you get jealous when I brought everyone a coffee but you?"
"I literally have nothing else to do and no one else to talk to."
Jonas made a show of wiping a tear from one eye. "I'm sorry I led you on. I'm definitely not allowed to give you coffee, coffee's bad for you. Besides, coffee is just for adults."
For some reason, I felt severely let down. "Have you even asked?" Then I registered what he said. "Adults? I'm..." I drew a blank again.
Jonas watched me with amusement. "Check yourself in the mirror."
[[Next|Check in the mirror day 3]]
(set: $jonasValue to it + 1)I couldn't make it through Jonas's whole shift before I had to have a break from him, heading into the bathroom to have at least a moment of peace.
Peeing was one of the world's simplest pleasures.
When I was done, I checked myself in the mirror for changes.
<ol><li>My skin was still patchy, but maybe a little less? I couldn't tell.</li><li>Were my eyes the same as yesterday? Hard to tell.</li><li>As for strength, I'd have a good chance to test it here soon, if they really did take me out for a...you know, a test.</li></ol>
There was something I couldn't really place, though. Something looked like it had progressed since yesterday, and the day before. I couldn't really tell my age. I looked like I was stuck somewhere between sixteen and twenty two, leaning more on the younger side, which didn't exactly thrill me.
[[I'm done here.|Fitness 1 - Part 1]]I rolled over and waited out the morning as long as I could. So long as Jonas thought I was asleep, he kept the mic off. It wasn't until I'd probably been awake for an hour or so that he turned it on.
"Get up, sleeping beauty. You've had enough beauty rest."
I tried putting my pillow over my ears to drown him out, but he kept going on and on and on.
[[Next|Check in the mirror day 3]]They came to get me at around 11:00 for my test, Xiao standing behind the glass viewport and <i>four</i> armed security guards behind her.
<i>Isn't that a bit excessive?</i> I wanted to ask, but I bit my tongue. I didn't need them assessing my strength any sooner than they needed to.
"Good morning," Xiao said into the mic. "How are you feeling on day 3?"
"Stop asking that," I cut across her. "Just--stop. Look at your fancy machines if you want to know how I'm <i>feeling</i>."
Xiao raised an eyebrow. "You're feeling good, then. There's more fire today."
"Whatever." I rolled my eyes. "Let's just get this overwith."
[[Next|Fitness 1 - Part 2]]"How does this work?" I asked. "The test."
Xiao indicated in the direction of the door with the hatch, to the right of the glass viewing panel. "You will please step toward the door so we can restrain your hands. From there, we'll restrain your feet. Once that's done, we can move on to the testing area."
"That's not what I meant."
"The testing will be abundantly clear when we reach the facility."
Glancing at the hatch, I thought quickly about whether I wanted to cause trouble, or do as they said.
[[Cause trouble.|Fitness 1 - Delay 1]]
[[Comply|Fitness 1 - Part 3]]I weighed my options for just a moment more before turning around and walking into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. I heard mutterings and groanings from the speaker, which made me smirk.
"Mekko, come out," came Xiao's voice. "You know this isn't going to end well for you."
[[Come out.|Fitness 1 - Part 3]]
[[Keep delaying.|Fitness 1 - Delay 2]]With a sigh, I did as they said and finally approached the main door. The hatch opened in front of me and I was instructed to put my arms through.
I put my hands through the hatch as they asked. There was no window on this door, so I couldn't see through, but I felt as someone handled my wrists. There was the clinking of something like handcuffs.
[[Don't cause trouble.|Fitness 1 - Part 4]]
[[<i>Do</i> cause trouble.|Fitness 1 - Grab Hand]]I said nothing, pressing my weight against the door and waiting. There wasn't any sound coming from them anymore. Mic was off? I strained my ears. In the other room, I heard--and felt in the air--the door with the hatch opening, and there were the mutters and grumbles again as the security guards cursed me.
I had enough time to barely taste a change in the air, and register the difference in air pressure now that the door had opened completely. Then, without warning, a force smashed into the other side of the bathroom door, jarring me off the floor for a fraction of a second. I pressed my weight against it, my heart racing, and had a terrible image of doing this same thing back where I used to live, when I'd been caught stealing from other desperate, desperate people like me living in the shadow of society. Only they were tough, and I hadn't been.
[[Keep resisting.|Fitness 1 - Delay 3]]
[[Give in.|Fitness 1 - Give up - bathroom door]]I hastily took off my socks so I'd have more traction against the floor, keeping my shoulder pressed against the door, but it only took a few more slams before the door burst inward and I was thrown back.
Instinct helped me roll through the fall, coming back up in a crouch. I felt like myself for the first time in a long time--I threw myself at them as soon as their silhouettes appeared through the door. There were two crammed in the entry, two others behind them, and before any of them could assess the situation, I whipped around, throwing punches and dodging theirs.
I overestimated myself, though; I still wasn't as strong as I'd been, and after some successful hits on my part, the two nearest managed to get a hold of me and pressed my face into the wall, holding my arms back so they could cuff them behind my back.
"Damn it," I hissed into the wall, but I was laughing too.
They held me there until they got my feet cuffed, hard as I tried to make it as difficult as possible for them.
<i>I'll try again. I'll try again when I'm stronger.</i>
[[Proceed to the test.|Fitness 1 - Part 4]]"Okay, okay!" I yelled. "I give up! I'm coming out."
The door stopped shuddering. I cautiously pulled away, cautiously turned the knob, and cautiously walked outside with my hands up. They cuffed my hands together, and then my ankles together, with just enough slack that I could take short strides.
The other me was mad.
[[Fitness 1 - Part 4]]They pulled me roughly along, through the door to the observation room, me in betwen two of those hulking security guards. I got to see the observation room for the first time without glass in between. Somehow it hadn't felt real. Seeing it from another angle gave me a thrill of (cycling-link: "excitement--I imagined smashing all of those instruments.", "frustration--all this time and I'd been so close to freedom, separated by just a wall.")
We passed through some hallways, some doors. There were other science-looking people in the building, watching with rapt stupidity, giving us a wide berth.
Then we emerged into a wide hallway with a tall ceiling. There was a small, electric car we all loaded onto, and then we were moving down this white, polished, indoor road. Lights flashed above me at regular intervals--electric, window, electric, window.
[[Next|Fitness 1 - Part 5]]
[[Test the restraints|Fitness 1 - car restraints]]I stood there. What should I do? If I participated, there was a chance I could get stronger. Strong enough to escape. But I'd also be playing right into their hands, giving them whatever data it was they wanted.
[[Look around|Fitness 1 - Observe]]
[[Do nothing|Fitness 1 - Do Nothing]]When I was confident I could do it, rotated my hand and wrist, grabbed the other person's forearm, and pulled, and there was a nice thud on the door as they--hopefully--hit their head and broke their nose against the other side.
The sound of grumbling. They still got my wrists cuffed to something, and I couldn't pull away from the door now. It opened outward and I had to stumble back, and two security guards appeared around it, glaring at me.
They bent down to cuff my feet together with a short chain in between. I wanted to kick them, but it seemed almost too petty.
[[Continue|Fitness 1 - Part 4]]We were unloading again, the security team pulling me onward, through hallways again, until I was met with a huge set of metal doors. Xiao input a code on a pad on the wall, and the doors opened with a hiss. I was pushed inside, and the doors closed again behind me.
The fitness test was in an huge, dome-like room with all kinds of structures, like a climbing area, a track, weights. Some parts looked like they had kind of an indoor garden, with trees and grass.
The observation area was raised up on a higher floor, so no matter which part of the room I was in, I assumed they'd be able to see me.
I stood there for a bit, almost literally twiddling my thumbs, before Xiao's voice came on, much louder than before and echoing through the whole area as if coming from speakers all over the gymnasium.
"Project Mekko, the entirety of this test will be recorded. Please take this time to use the area to exercise and test your strength. If it makes you feel more motivated, feel free to try to find a means of escape."
(cycling-link: "I resisted the urge to turn around and glare at the observation room.", "I turned to face the observation room behind me and gave it a good glare, and a rude hand gesture.")
Xiao kept going: "When you hear the buzzer, the test has concluded. At that point, please proceed to bring yourself to the entrance for collection."
[[Get started|Fitness 1 - Part 6]][[Climbing Area|Fitness 1 - Climbing Area]]
[[Swimming Pool|Fitness 1 - Swimming Pool]]
[[Track|Fitness 1 - Track]]
[[Weights|Fitness 1 - Weights]]
[[Do nothing|Fitness 1 - Do Nothing]]I sat on the floor and looked up at the ceiling. There were patches of sky I could see on skylights far overhead. I wondered why there were so many of those.
After I'd done this for a few minutes, the intercom crackled on. "Project Mekko. Let's get moving."
I ignored Xiao's voice and inspected my nails. They'd started to get kind of long.
"Are you just going to sit there?"
I nodded absently to myself. I barely caught Xiao starting to say something to her colleagues when the microphone clicked off.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 0)I headed over to the climbing area, where there were choices between climbing craggy and sheer rock faces, slick and rough tree trunks, and the facades of buildings.
I started where I was most comfortable: the buildings. I was already pretty good at leaping from window sill to window sill, swinging myself up onto rooftops to keep watch for the family. Come to think of it, the other me had been at least a little good at that too. From a quick glance, I could tell there were easier and harder portions of the building.
[[Easy|Fitness 1 - Climbing Easy]]
[[Hard|Fitness 1 - Climbing Hard]]I headed in the direction of the swimming pool. It was full sized, with a shallow end and a deep end. I had the jarring sensation of both wariness and noncholance. It was very possible that only one of me knew how to swim.
I approached it, fighting both senations. At one point I had to force myself onward. But I got to the edge, stripped off my clothes, and dove in.
When my body broke the surface, I instantly seized up. Briefly I panicked, flailing and sinking, inhaling water. Panic rising like bile, I found the edge of the pool with a hand, clutched it, and brought myself over the edge, coughing up water on all fours.
"Damn you," I said to myself. "You've ruined me."
I was immensely relieved to be alive.
Glancing up, I saw that there were staff running toward me from the direction of the metal door: a few guards and a few regulars. Probably medical.
"Back off," I yelled. "I'm fine."
Someone slowed down and looked up at the observation room. Xiao's voice came on. "He seems fine. We'll continue the testing."
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
[[Observe|Fitness 1 - Observe]]There was a track that snaked around the whole area. I inspected it, though to be honest it wasn't really as if I knew what I was looking at. I stretched a little bit, took some deep breaths, and started down the middle lane.
The texture was spongy underneath my feet, like running on soft ground. It was perfect on my bare skin, giving me enough grip to propel forward but not too harsh. I hadn't run in so long--I felt like I was flying. I closed my eyes as I went around the turns. The air rushed in my face as I pushed myself faster and faster. I'd been faster before, but then again, I hadn't.
I ran longer than I expected to. It was like I went into a trance, pushing myself harder and harder, my feet guiding me without my brain's input. For once, both voices in my head shut up and I felt quiet. Not the quiet of my room, with the drone of the air conditioning and the relentless eyes of the people behind the glass. My brain was finally quiet.
Running took up my whole time.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 1)They must have gotten whatever data they needed, because they didn't ask me any questions on the way back. They very carefully put me back in my room, first getting me to stand on the prison side of the door, putting my hands through the hatch, restraining them there while they undid my feet, then closing the door behind them, undoing my hands, and closing the hatch, leaving me inside.
[[Next|Day 10]]They'd linked my hands to a bar mounted on the seat in front of me. I pulled at them, but they didn't give much past a rattling sound.
The guards on either side of me watched.
[[Next|Fitness 1 - Part 5]]I stared down at the racks of weights and oddments against the wall. They sat there, dull. <i>What am I supposed to do with this?</i> I thought.
[[Try to use them|Fitness 1 - Weights - Use]]
[[Throw them|Fitness 1 - Weights - Throw]]This area was full of hand holds like window sills, decorative moulding, rain gutters, whatever. Rolling my shoulders, I got a running start and leapt up.
Nothing but grace. Anywhere I reached, I found a place to pull myself up. I deftly swung up and up, digging my toes in to propel myself higher. I found myself relishing the experience--finally a chance to stretch and move and sweat. I felt my muscles sing.
I got to the top quickly, and was rewarded with a better view of the place. A little below my eye level, I saw the observation room at the far end of the gymnasium.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
[[Observe|Fitness 1 - Observe]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 1)This area didn't have as many handholds as the easier area. Rolling my shoulders, I got a running start and leapt up.
It was harder than I expected it to be: I had to reach further than was comfortable, and sometimes I had to jump to get the right grasp. I dug my fingers and toes into the mortar between bricks. My muscles started aching before I got to the top. My arms and legs shook. What would happen if I fell?
I dragged myself over the lip of the building, my arms screaming and shaking. Inch by inch I lifted myself higher, blessing the moon when I got there. Panting, I fell onto my back and breathed for minutes before sitting back up. A little below my eye level, above the trappings of the pool and track and whatnot, I saw the observation room at the far end of the gymnasium.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
[[Observe|Fitness 1 - Observe]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 2)Like an idiot, I picked up a heavy weight and tried to imitate what I'd seen in magazines and billboards. I curled the weight up to my shoulder using my biceps. I sat against the wall with the weight on top of my thighs. I did push ups with the weight on my back.
This was stupid.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
[[Observe|Fitness 1 - Observe]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 1)I started with the lighter weights and started transferring them, pair by pair, over to where the observation room was. I couldn't get much further than the 80 pound weights in each hand, trudging carefully. Once they were all piled up underneath, I started chucking them at the glass on the second floor.
I did pretty well with the lower weights. Even up to about 30 pounds, I was making it to the second story, the weights bouncing harmlessly off the composite material. But anything above that and I just couldn't get the height.
The initial reaction of the viewers beyond was worth it--that, and their increasing frustration.
[[End|Fitness 1 - End]]
[[Observe|Fitness 1 - Observe]]
(set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 2)I'm pretty sure it was day 10, and something had started to change. I spent less time arguing with myself, for one thing--the two voices had started to quiet down, barely if ever making me second guess or pinpoint any strangeness in my thinking. It left me more lonely and bored than before.
(cycling-link: bind $suzannahTalk10, "I let Suzannah try to be my friend, if passively.", "I still ignored Suzannah's attempts at conversation.")
(cycling-link: bind $nicoleTalk10, "I got what information I could from Nicole.", "Most nights, I just slept to avoid Nicole.")
(cycling-link: bind $jonasTalk10, "I even suffered through Jonas's terrible sense of humor.", "I ignored Jonas even more than any of the others.")
[[Next|Day 10 - Update]]Things were still changing.
<ol><li>I was getting stronger. (set: $mekkoStrength to $mekkoStrength + 5) We'd done a few fitness tests since the first one a week ago. If I had to guess, I was getting stronger faster than I should have, as a human or as a werewolf.</li><li>I was growing surly. I think it was the general absense of the angry one, and the timid one. With the two of them gone, or maybe just combined, I was left to stew on my own. Now that I was whole, I was just...I didn't know.</li><li>My skin had settled down into a uniform shade, inbetween where I'd been before on either side: pale and tan.</li><li>My eyes looked like they were trying to be yellow, which was unexpected.</li><li>My hair had started coming in <i>white.</i></li></ol>
Probably most importantly, something unexplainable was happening, and I hadn't been the only one to notice. The bastards behind the glass pulled me out to let them investigate, and I was strapped to a metal chair, with bastards in front of me, looking at me, and bastards behind me, doing something to my back.
[[Next|Implant and Investigate]]
{(if: $suzannahTalk10 is "I let Suzannah try to be my friend, if passively.")[(set: $suzannahValue to $suzannahValue + 5)]}
{(if: $nicoleTalk10 is "I got what information I could from Nicole.")[(set: $nicoleValue to $nicoleValue + 5)]}
{(if: $jonasTalk10 is "I even suffered through Jonas's terrible sense of humor.")[(set: $jonasValue to $jonasValue + 5)]}I stared dully at Xiao and her team in front of me, who were examining me with narrowed eyes. Jonas was on duty right now, and he stood patiently behind them, his expression always on the verge of playfulness. He had brought up the anamoly to Xiao a few days ago, but since it had been a weekend and not apparently urgent, they'd waited until today to act.
Behind me, some of the doctors were operating on a patch of skin in between my shoulder blades. Pretty much my whole body was fixed in place, otherwise I'd be making hell, if I could. They didn't tell me what they were doing, but I could guess they were implanting that taser device they warned me about a few days ago, when I'd made trouble a little too willingly. I'd get it out.
Xiao and her team must have made up their minds, because they drew back and were nodding to each other.
"So what's wrong with me, doctor?"
Xiao tilted her head pensively to one side. "This is something we anticipated as a possibility. We just didn't expect it to actually happen, favorable as it is."
[[Next|Permanent Werewolf]]She held up a hand mirror to me and I saw myself facing out of it. No more <i>oh wah, who is this? Who am I?</i> It was just me who stared back.
"Do you see how your ears have shifted upward? Their shape has started to change, and you can barely see that there is hair growing from the back of them."
"So what?" I asked. This was tedious.
"It seems the genetic therapy was successfully able to integrate the desirable aspects of your werewolf half. Except, rather than transforming into a beast only on the full moon, it appears as if this transformation is permanent. We predict we'll see additional changes in your body, such as greater strength, heightened senses, and, um...Well, a tail."
Jonas gave me a sarcastic nod and a thumbs up from behind Xiao's back.
Xiao looked me over. "In fact, it looks like you're already growing one."
[[Next|Permanent Werewolf fallout]]I thought the surprises were over after those first few days, but this made me jerk forward in my seat. "Are you kidding?" I asked, shocked.
This changed things. I remembered what it had been like to change into the beast on the full moon: power, instinct. It wasn't mindless like humans thought--no thoughtless killing and ripping of flesh--but it was a different version of myself, one that I sometimes wished for when the moon began to wane. If they let me keep this form constantly, there was no way they could keep me here.
On the other hand, being a werewolf had prevented my old family from moving freely. We had to be careful we didn't stand out, or move carelessly. Trapping me in that form meant I'd never be anonymous again. Anyone would know what I was as soon as they saw me.
If I was stuck somewhere between a human and a werewolf, I didn't belong in either camp, instead just a twisted combination of the two. It made it seem even more like these people owned me, because they'd made me.
[[Next|Keep Watch]]I kept watch over the next several days, paying attention to the changes they'd mentioned. Those days turned into weeks. It didn't take long--in fact, it was alarming how fast my body changed.
My ears had shifted, from their places on either side of my head, to sitting behind and above my temples. They were now undeniably wolf's ears, growing with white hair. In fact, all of my hair was white now, including the coarse hair on my goddamn tail. They'd, obviously humorously to them, given me different styles of pants to wear to accomodate.
My face was sharper, my eyes yellow, and my nails had sharpened and hardened. There was more hair growing on the backs of my arms than was normal for a human, and on the tops of my feet. My teeth were sharper. My muscles were leaner. I ate more, and slept worse.
I looked like something I might have found abandoned in a puddle in a back alley, an mistake rightfully left behind. They'd done this to me.
I was restless.
[[Next|Keep Watch 2]]"I honestly didn't expect this," Suzannah was saying to me one day. Day 29 or so.